ok, this is a gross post, but funny, and disgusting and i couldn't help but share it. i need to know that i am not alone. we are starting to potty train, or what i am slowly learning should be called - hell. just when you think life may start to get a bit more normal, your child is talking, sleeping (a bit), has teeth and is eating normally, a slight euphoria hits you, i can handle this, it's gonna be ok, and then wham - enter the POTTY. i hate the potty. we have hardly started the potty training and i already hate the potty. i especially hate that stupid, unintelligent, ridiculously overplayed and over advertised "potty dance" commercial. what the fu*& is that? i'm sorry to go off on a tangent, but that dance is dumb. ok, i said it. moving on.
we started potty training, things have been going good, until the other day. we decided to go the route of letting mackenzie set her own pace. we didn't want to really force her too much, as she isn't even 2 yet. i wanted it to be a relaxing experience for her and she seems keen to learn. we do the training pants during the day and diapers when we go out and at night. i usually ask her in the morning if she would prefer diapers or training pants and she usually wants the training pants. well the other day, it was the diaper she wanted. i should have known.so we put that diaper on. i was sick and having a very, very rough day and had been counting down the hours/minutes till my husband got home from work, which was late. i was laying on the couch in misery, when i spotted my angel daughter (ya right) out of the corner of my eye crouching in the corner. i then heard that rrrriiippping sound of the velcro coming off. just as i turned to stop her, flop, off came the diaper and out rolled a huge poop. now, not to be too graphic, some fell out of the diaper, and what did my angel baby do, picked it up. she looked at me and in slow motion i yelled "nooooooooo", she then decided it was gross, and stunk and wanted it off her hands. she started flicking that poo all over my light beige carpet. now, i had already thrown up everything in my tummy, thank goodness, or i would have barfed right then and there and the sight of her little legs and bum covered in poop, hands brown with it and my poor, rental carpet covered in it.
my question to you is, what the heck do you do in a situation like this? cry? barf? get drunk? i called my hubby and told him how much he owes me and asked him to bring me home a cookie. i think i was crazed. a cookie? don't ask me why, but in that situation the only thing that would make my disgust disappear was to eat something i hardly ever eat. and you know what, this situation happened a few days ago, and what did i bake today - cookies. i am still recovering. i think i have post traumatic shi* disorder.
any of you out there suffering? let's share our stories - i need to know i am not alone out here.
Sorry, I find this funny. But I probably won't when it comes time for me to potty train my little one. At least your cutie didn't eat the poop! My aunt has a story about how she was babysitting one of the kids in my family (she's not saying who), after changing a diaper she let the kid run around for a bit. Some time went by and it was weirdly quiet. She investigated, only to find that kid at the garbage rooting around. She screamed out, and in slo-mo the kid turned around with brown smeared all over the mouth area!
ReplyDeleteI pray that I don't experience that with my kid!!
When my daughter was just a few days old I was napping with her on my bare chest. I woke up and got up with her and then realized that there was something on me....it was a huge slick of yellow poop that had blown up the front of her diaper. Welcome to motherhood....
ReplyDeleteI totally hear you. We tried the potty training in three days method (do a search for it on babycenter.com and you'll find it). Anyhow, it's basically a condensed version of potty training. I couldn't handle it. My daughter did okay with it, but not me. I think part of the problem was that you're supposed to have both partners completely involved in the process - take a long weekend and focus on nothing else but your kid and the potty - and my hubby wasn't able to be there the whole time.
ReplyDeleteBy the end of the weekend, I was the one losing my sh** (pun totally intended), and ready to put the diapers back on. And I wasn't even sick! So yeah, I hear ya. Sounds like things are going better now though - congrats!
Unfortunately you don't have to be potty training for something like this to happen. Last night after my son's bath I let him have some bare bum time as I gathered up his PJs and diaper. I found him in the kitchen with poo on his arms and legs, the floor, freezer and my flip-flop that he had been playing with :S Of course hubby was at work so I was left to re-bath DS and clean the poo off the floor.
ReplyDeleteLOL, I hadn't read this before so it made me laugh. I wrote about a similar incident a while ago with my two boys. Here's the link:
ReplyDeletehttp://heathertyfeatherty.blogspot.com/2009/02/poop-house.html
Short story - a poop flung out of my son's diaper and in my sleepless stupor I didn't see it until he was carrying it around. Nice.
Ahh, the adventures of mommying. It doesn't get any better than this.
Heather
heathertyfeatherty at gmail dot com
My son was well after three when we contemplated training. He used to go upstairs grip the top post of the staircase and do it in his undies and right on 3.00 pm, just as I was contemplating leaving to pick up his sister from school. There were a few phone calls to school that I was going to be late ... Finally he got it and boy are we happy!
ReplyDelete